Best of the Worst: The Wicker Man Movie Review

Some things in life are unintentionally beautiful: when a women flips her hair, when ducklings cross the road with their mother, or when a baby laughs. Watching The Wicker Man I would classify as one of the most unintentionally beautiful moments of my life. It will captivate your heart, capture your soul, in a blissful and an eternal performance worthy of the highest praise and awards by Nicolas Cage. In the greatest picture released within the past decade, The Wicker Man will have you on a rollacoster of emotions. At its highest points, if you allow him, Cage will whisk you away on an adventure full of laughter, sorrow, and beauty. The Wicker Man is one of the most underappreciated movies of our life time. Some people don’t understand this soul filled art form and are so oblivious to the Mona Lisa of motion pictures of our life time. Only 3.7% of IMDB users understand this giving this movie a overly deserve 10/10. With something that goes beyond the bounds of human possibility, Cage and company play off each other like an orchestra playing works of Beethoven. There is no better way to get Cage to burst with god like acting ability then giving him a story which has him search for a lost daughter. His uncontrollable passion drives viewers to believe he is actually trying to seek out his real life daughter. The characters are only assisted by possibly the best script ever written. The director, Neil Labute, is so confident (and rightly so) in his actors/actresses he almost seemingly forgot to edit out extremely large, dialogue empty moments between characters. The artistic expression of this possibly unintentional decision was so deeply touching and really fleshed out the characters on a level most movies can’t reach. The metaphor of the society being that of a society of bees is something that will only be appreciated once historians find this beautiful work among the less deserving works. The movie will appease the extreme feminist of society showing them a society that subjugates men to be powerless slaves of society. In a beautiful act, the movie gives meninist a pleasant surprise as Nicolas Cage rages against this women lead society and dishes out some serious damage in such expressive moments while in a Bear costume. The symbolism  of this is beyond reach of such feeble minds such as mine. Expressing the need for you to watch this movie is something I can’t put into words. Watch this movie. The art piece of the century .

Wicker Man 2006 6

Grade: Beyond that of which this scale contains.

Hopefully you understand this is satire but you still must watch this amazingly bad film.


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